On the Verge of a New Chapter

One year ago Jared and I were returning from our Caribbean cruise and trying to plan out how the next year would look for us. It was unknown, but the one thing we were certain about trying was going overseas with work. We were ready to make that happen late fall 2012, early winter 2013. Fast forward 4 months to our anniversary dinner discussing one day expanding our family thinking we would spend the next year overseas and then maybe start trying. With the wheels already in motion making moves trying to figure out the best international opportunity for us, we quickly had to reroute our plan as we found out the morning after our anniversary dinner we were expecting Jaxon. Fast forward another 8 months and now we are on the verge of the next steps of our life. It’s funny how quickly things change. Just when you think you have your plans all figured out, God naturally throws in a curve ball and changes it all up! We could not have been more thrilled with this curve ball and look forward to taking Jaxon overseas for some family international experience with work in the next several years. We would love for all of our children to have that exposure and know the whole world is at their fingertips!  

This post could possibly be the last post before he arrives or there could be 3 more. Ok…we both know I won’t be writing 3 more even if he doesn’t come for another 3 weeks. Sorry y’all I’m a busy lady! ;) It’s fun to reminisce about the last year and where we are today anxiously awaiting the arrival of our first baby. I am so thankful for such a beautiful pregnancy and ask that you cover us in prayer for an equally beautiful birth experience. I have spent the last 8 months with the thought of a natural birth in my head..trust me I even tried to get it out of mind. Before I got pregnant I thought all you women who delivered totally natural were crazy, but then it became one of my biggest hopes and I even started to think I would let myself down if it didn’t work out as a natural birth. After months of research, watching live birth videos (Yeah Jared really loved when I did that lol), studying scripture and constant prayer I have total peace going into this birth that whatever happens is perfect. I don’t know if I have the body to give birth naturally, but if he decides to come on his own without induction (which I really hope he does) I am going to try. However, I am not going to be disappointed if I need to get an epidural or if the process ends in a C-section. Whatever happens is perfect because no matter the way he decides to come we will get to see those beautiful eyes staring back at us at the end of it. No matter what, I want to enjoy the whole process. No matter how painful, overwhelming or anxiety-filled it could possibly get I want to look back on the experience and just remember how special every moment was. As women, our bodies were made to do this! I have pushed my body to what I thought was its furthest limits before through athletics, but this is about to be a whole new ball game. Am I ready for it? Who knows, but it’s coming either way and I am prepared to keep my body, mind and heart strong for him. I have learned that pregnancy and soon childbirth is a challenging time physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, but it’s also the greatest time to be strong in all of those. It’s a perfect example of all of that coming together in what will be the greatest moment in our life thus far. I tell Jared I think I am just going to cry the whole time being so overwhelmed with love at the thought of seeing/holding him the first time. There is a good possibility of this happening and the nurses will probably have to be like get it together crazy lady! We ask that you pray for us for a healthy labor and delivery and most importantly a healthy baby.

I’m encouraged to know I’ll be going through this with the greatest partner. Jared has been so incredibly supportive and confident during this whole pregnancy. There were times when I was so worried about the Jaxon’s health or certain results and he always stood strong in faith that Jaxon was 100% healthy and this pregnancy would be seen through the very end until he was in our arms. It was good to have that at all times. When I asked Jared if he is ready for the birth and knows what to do, he simply answers “All I need to know what to do is to say What can I do for you? What do you need?” His only request is that Jaxon doesn’t show up before this Wednesday because our new awesome video camera doesn’t get here til then ;) I know his confidence and strength is going to be key on that day because it’s going to keep me strong and confident in the whole process. I’m thankful for him, for our love and friendship and for our marriage. We make a great team and can’t wait add this little guy into the mix!

Another good appointment yesterday. We had a quick ultrasound to check his amniotic fluid and make sure he’s still a happy camper, because I have not gained any weight in the last 2 appointments. He’s doing great getting what he needs and I’m ok with not gaining excess weight in the last month. I think both of us are about maxed out! One things for sure, he has chubby cheeks! Everyone who has done an ultrasound on him makes that comment. We made solid progress this last week and the reality has set in about Jaxon being full term and he could literally come at any moment. Hopefully by next Monday we make even more progress towards the big day! Fingers crossed my water does not break at work!

 

XOXO

9 Months and Counting!

Hello 9^th month of pregnancy! It’s so great to finally be to this point, however it now becomes the world’s longest waiting game. Impatience at its best. The last 36 weeks have flown by, so we can stick it out for few more ;) Almost two weeks ago we had our final ultrasound to check out Jaxon’s weight estimate..and we have a big a big boy! Or so we thought leaving that ultrasound. After our regular appointment with the doctor we headed over to the hospital to get the ultrasound done and it was our favorite so far. We enjoyed it even better than the 4D because the nurse was able to get so many great shots. Jaxon surprisingly was not camera shy this time J We saw his hair, ears, fingers and toes wiggling, strong legs, cute face with chubby cheeks, his strong heart beating and even his eyelashes! He makes all sorts of expressions and it was like an intro into his little personality before he’s even here. Jared had another proud Dad moment when the nurse said, “look at him flexing his muscles for us. ;)” He still moves a lot and I don’t think he will be slowing down before labor. This boy is going to wiggle his way all the out!

 After all the measurements the nurse estimated his weight at 6lbs 9oz…my mouth dropped! I told Jared we need to go straight home to pack the hospital bag and get ready because he has got to come out. Almost 7lbs at almost 35 weeks….if you do the math that makes him between 9 and 10 lbs at 40 weeks(probably closer to 10!!). For this momma who would love to deliver him naturally that is just not going to work out for me! We left the appointment on a high after spending half an hour watching our son on the screen and totally convinced ourselves he is coming early and thinking the doctor would completely agree. I couldn’t wait to get back to our doctor a week later and see what she had to say about the results from the ultrasound (a nurse did our scan at the hospital not the doctor). I knew in the back of my mind she wouldn’t think anything of it as it is all just estimates, but I still wanted to think maybe she would want to get him out like tomorrow if he really is that big. She came in and laughed at me when I said, “did you see the weight?!” and quickly reminded us she has delivered plenty of babies who have been estimated at 8lbs at 35 weeks and only weighed 8lbs when they were born a month later. She just needs a ballpark range and nothing we can do to know for sure. My stomach is measuring on time and not far ahead like Jaxon was estimated at so we will see how much he actually weighs when he decides to come on out. She did however say she would love to see me get through the next 2 weeks and then deliver (on my own, not induced) to keep him from getting so big and really wants to see me make good progress over that time. We have made a little progress, but still have ways to go. My body is definitely at work preparing for labor, so I take it all as good signs but now it is just a big guessing game when he will come. Really hoping we progressed a good bit when we get checked at the next appointment on Monday. I came on my due date and Jared was 10 days late, so hoping he takes after me and not Jared in this if he doesn’t come early. At least I know she will only let me go max 1 week over if it comes down to it…hopefully we don’t even have to worry about that! Either way, we are in the home stretch and will get to meet him just a few short weeks. We could not be more excited/ready! Come on Jaxon!!

 The countdown is officially on! Place your bets now!

Love,

The Hawkins